My experience of sexual abuse from Fr. Ruben Tanseco, S.J. has led me away from God. It is ironic that my experience of sexual abuse was done by a Jesuit who would give retreats and promote the Spiritual Exercises. I cannot reconcile my experience of sexual abuse from a Jesuit with his task of showing the way to God through the Spiritual Exercises. As I remember how Fr. Ruben Tanseco sucked my dick, all the more that I distance myself from God. His sucking my dick does not represent a path to God. As I remember how Fr. Ruben Tanseco fondled my genitals, more and more I socially exclude myself and become more comfortable in isolation. As I remember how Fr. Ruben Tanseco masturbated my penis until I ejaculate, I experience being overpowered and dominated. I lost my dignity as a human person. I lost my faith in a Church I wanted to serve as a priest.