Holy Thursday for a Victim of Sexual Abuse by a Jesuit

The weather is just warm but depressing. I can sense I start to feel jittery and my breathing start to become faster. I know something is going on inside that wants to be released, some kind of a poison I just have to expel from my system. I would remember how Holy Thursday was for me. It has been years that I have not considered this week holy. I can remember the washing of the feet being re-enacted on Holy Thursday services. However, it has ceased to be meaningful to me. I would imagine Fr. Ruben Tanseco, S.J. re-enacting the washing of the feet using his hands consecrated to make things holy at ordination. But I think of the same hands that fondled my genitals and masturbated my penis until I ejaculate. I would imagine Fr. Ruben Tanseco, S.J. kissing the feet of the apostles after washing them. The lips he used to kiss the apostles’ feet were the same lips that sucked my dick. These flashbacks make me shudder. These images make me tremble in anger and hate. I know something is wrong somewhere. But that is what a Holy Thursday simply is.

4 thoughts on “Holy Thursday for a Victim of Sexual Abuse by a Jesuit

  1. A sickening Holy Thursday spectacle presided over by a Jesuit priest who was a combination of “Judas Iscariot” and one of those “who should have a millstone put around his neck and cast into the sea” for the way he has treated Christ’s “little ones”.

    Liked by 4 people

  2. I am SO sorry for the horrific trauma you suffered from a man who claimed to represent Jesus Christ. That evil man does not know Christ. There are far too many imposters, wolves in sheep’s clothing, doing what he did, and THEY WILL BE BROUGHT TO JUSTICE IN THE END.

    The emotional and spiritual pain you have endured and continue to endure are utterly indescribable. However, Jesus came to heal the brokenhearted, and you can not only be a survivor of the abuse, but more than a conqueror through the PURE love of Jesus Christ. Your life matters and speaking out is a critical part of your healing process.

    Thank you for signing up to receive the Healing the Brokenhearted Devotionals that I post on Mondays and Fridays. I also post articles on the All for Jesus Ministries’ website once a month and recently published one titled, “Justice… What is It?” This is the link:

    May our truly loving, Most High God heal your heart, mind and spirit as only He is able. With God all things are possible! (Matthew 19:26) You are in my prayers.

    Liked by 2 people

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